just can't make this stuff up

at work yesterday, this awkward boy comes in asking to talk to one of my fellow coworkers, who is also awkward.

she goes to meet him outside and comes back in with this GIANT valentines day card ( I should have taken a picture. it was THAT good. )

It said something along the lines of:

"You are my lover

You are my friend

A Love like ours

Will never end.

Dear *Mallory,

You are the most beautiful girl I have ever met. I can't wait to spend time with you. Love, *Ron

me: so Mallory, is he your boyfriend?

Mal: I think so.

me: Cute... How long have you guys been dating?

Mal: Oh.... .... .... About three days.

me: ....interesting...

And how long have you known him?...

Mal: About two days.

me: (Completely teasing) oooh. so is he a good kisser? (then regretting asking because I knew she would answer)

Mal: I didn't want to say anything... but he kissed me twelve times.

me: huh.... neat!

And I walked away.

priceless. and hilarious.